Take This Quiver And Deliver
Do you prefer Bulfinch's Mythology or LARP-ing, Live Action Role Playing?
Time to dress up and get into character!
Rapunzel: Wherefore art thou? Fun can be found in an A&W root beer float by Baskin & Robbins 31 Flavor friends.
What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Chocolate on the Outside, I'm cool and creamy on the inside.
Buried in the frozen tundra of Wisconsin’s prison system, I yearn for hot toddies and fresh out the oven apple pie graced a la mode.
Without a fireman's ladder to traverse down these cobbled stoned heights, my double entendre are 2 scoops short of a sundae afternoon blizzard trip to DQ my delicate voluptuous Dairy Queen.
So, let down your hair.
Disney Princesses: Entrapped behind these castle walls, vicariously I imagine you bareback on our thrones of gilded gold, in the throes of passion with another or stymied in a diabetic coma like Sleeping Beauty, who loves overindulging, listening to you reread this letter on Poison Apple device my Haagen Dazs cherry lyrics through Merlin The Magician’s alchemy rose tinted laptop or The Wizard of Oz's petite pint sized mobile. One kiss and you too shall awaken to my Charming tale.
Respondez sil vous plait !
Beloved: You are cordially invited to attend court in my absence, exchange missives of parchment and engage in an ice cream social.
While they have their " Hot Girls Night Out! " Concubines that are my Neapolitan treats of choc - o - taco Africans, vanilla bean Europeans and strawberry blush Asians mount your sceptres side saddle, air deliver yourselves as if The Good Witch Glinda and tasty as ambrosia do pay homage to me your Nubian French Burger King.
Like Culvers. It's a mixer! So, everybody into the moat!
Sir Lancelot: With no LGBTQ rainbow snowcones chances of jousting on the horizon, Sword crossing Heterosexual Knights, King of Leon fruit infused Squires or Ben & Jerry prison reform connoisseurs are encouraged to take off their suits of armor, make a full moon, lunar splash landing at The Dragons, Darts & Farts Monty Python Grub & Pub of Hilarious High Jinx!
After a relaxing mud bath with your mates, gravitate to ink & quill and send this Shakespearean creative writing frozen custard barista some cultured escargot mail you flamboyant men servants.
Regardless of how you soft serve it. In a spotted banana split plastic float or baby blue Tiffany crystal dish. My mail call doesn't discriminate against my heroes.
Circumnavigating, The Globe, like corona virus. These words are a grand opportunity to like, share, retweet, send and friend. Go viral! Reaching millions. But, wear your mask, watch your social distance and wash your hands more often to flatten the COVID-19 curve.
From Virtual Reality to The Real World .
Twist your wrist as Lady Godiva! Get nude scouring the internet for tantalizing conversations and companionship in the privacy of your own chateau.
Overwhelm me with tasteful emails, tactful computer downloads or sincerest of romantic golden stationary leaf.
36-24-36! Built like a brick shit house?
Slumped over as you've grown older?
Think yourself an ogre?
Come lean on my shoulders!
The occasional trolls and mischiefs of mayhem that reveal themselves as catfish shall remain banished from The Realm until they repent for their sins against The LARP-ing Gods!
Loyal Subjects: Follow this decree .
To avoid The Dungeon Masters confiscation policies. No knaves with knives, files in cakes or mace to the face of my captures.
Kindly lick sticky confection residue off of your manicured Lee Press On fingernails prior to stuffing the envelope with your pearls of wisdom.
If you are mulatto! I am into gelato!
As straight as Cupid’s arrows shafts.
Take this quiver and deliver.
Your vanquished King James II
